In a video posted to TikTok, a woman named Angela Baker begins by saying, \u201cFellow Gen X and millennials, let\u2019s talk about our parents and their need for dishonest harmony.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\nBarker, who thankfully did not experience this phenomenon growing up, but says her husband \u201ccertainly\u201d did, shared that when she\u2019s tried to discuss this topic, the typical response she\u2019d get from Boomers would be to \u201cStop talking about it. We don\u2019t need to hear about it. Move on. Be quiet.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And it\u2019s this attitude that\u2019s at the core of dishonest harmony.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat that\u2019s showing is their lack of ability to handle the distress that they feel when we talk openly about uncomfortable things,\u201d she says. \u201cWhat they want is dishonest harmony rather than honest conflict. Keep quiet about these hard issues. Suppress your pain, suppress your trauma. Definitely don\u2019t talk openly about it so that you can learn to heal and break the cycle,\u201d she continues. \u201cWhat matters most is that we have the appearance<\/em> of harmony, even if there\u2019s nothing harmonious under the surface.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\nBarker concludes by theorizing that it was this need to promote a certain facade that created most of the toxic parenting choices of that time period.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThe desire of boomer parents to have this perception that everything was sweet and hunky dory, rather than prioritizing the needs of their kids, is what drove a lot of the toxic parenting we experienced.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Barker\u2019s video made others feel so seen, as clearly indicated by the comments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHow did I not hear about dishonest harmony until now? This describes my family dynamic to a T. And if you disrespect that illusion, you are automatically labeled as the problem. It\u2019s frustrating,\u201d one person wrote.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cTHANK YOU SO MUCH! I\u2019m a 49 yo biker sitting in my bedroom crying right now. You just put a name to my darkness!\u201d added another<\/p>\n\n\n\nMany shared how they were refusing to repeat the cycle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
One wrote, \u201cThis is EXACTLY my family dynamic. I\u2019m the problem because I won\u2019t remain quiet. Not anymore. Not again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI love when my kids tell me what I did wrong. It gives me a chance to acknowledge and apologize. Everyone wants to be heard,\u201d said another.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Of course, no parenting style is perfect. And all parents are working with the current ideals of the time, their own inner programming and their inherent need to course correct child raising problems of the previous generation. Gen Alpha parents will probably cringe at certain parenting styles currently considered in vogue. It\u2019s all part of the process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But hopefully one thing we have learned as a collective is that true change happens when we summon the courage to have difficult conversations.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
People finally have words to describe their experience. There are certainly many things the Boomer parents generally did right when raising their kids. Teaching them the importance of<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6509,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6508","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/652121669_1401119578715696_8681692102834760370_n.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6508","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6508"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6508\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6510,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6508\/revisions\/6510"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6509"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6508"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6508"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6508"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
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