{"id":2726,"date":"2025-11-14T07:02:40","date_gmt":"2025-11-14T07:02:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/?p=2726"},"modified":"2025-11-14T07:02:41","modified_gmt":"2025-11-14T07:02:41","slug":"your-kids-do-not-come-first-marriage-is-between-two-people-and-thats-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/?p=2726","title":{"rendered":"Your Kids Do Not Come First\u2014Marriage Is Between Two People, And That\u2019s It"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u201cI told my wife, Sara, that I was going to be writing an article about marriage. If any of you thought you heard the sound of an eye roll the other day, it was from her. Not because she thinks I\u2019m bad at marriage, but because what kind of advice can I give to people? Honestly, she\u2019s right. I\u2019m not going to tell you what you should do or that I know better than you with regards to marriage. We\u2019ve only been married two years, but there are some lessons I\u2019ve learned that may or may not help you. Take it or leave it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Bride<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

I won\u2019t bore you with what everyone already knows. \u2018Marriage is built on trust.\u2019 \u2018Marry your best friend.\u2019 Blah blah blaaaah. If you\u2019ve been to a wedding in the last decade you\u2019ve heard the bride and groom promise all of those things to each other. Don\u2019t get me wrong, those things are incredibly important and are great foundations for marriage, but everyone already knows those things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Something we started our marriage with, and is commonly misconstrued, is that marriage is between two people (three if you\u2019re Christian \u2018cause God). And that\u2019s it. My Aunt Steph, one of the smartest, most blunt people I know, told me before I got married, \u2018People say you marry the family too. That\u2019s not true. Your marriage is between you two.\u2019 I\u2019m not saying your family isn\u2019t important. I value my family a lot (not as much as my wife does, but still\u2026). You need them to lean on when life gets hard and to lift you guys up, but I didn\u2019t marry her mom and she didn\u2019t marry my dad. We had to learn to go to each other first when life threw us curveballs, instead of instinctually going to our parents. We\u2019re a family now, and that family comes first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve heard this talked about by a few, but I\u2019ll reiterate, your partner and you will change and grow. You\u2019ve been doing it for the last 20+ years, why would you stop when you get married? You have things you want to accomplish (hopefully) and you\u2019ll grow and change on your way to do it. Our pastor told us in a pre-marital counseling session, that as a couple we\u2019d have goals, and as individuals we would have goals. To succeed as a couple, we would both tackle those goals. Sometimes I would be the captain (like when tackling mine) and sometimes Sara would be. But we\u2019d both be working towards that goal. That\u2019s the beauty of marriage. You\u2019ve got this life partner to raise you up. Like Kim and Kanye.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A big humongous monstrosity of a lesson I\u2019ve learned that I PRAY that all of you will strongly take into consideration, is that your kids do not come first. Our kids are sooo important and are the future and all that fun jazz, but what\u2019s best for them is a beautiful example of two people who love each other (and God). Another great thing for them to know is that they are not the center of the universe. Sorry if you\u2019re reading this in the future, Jack and Cam and any other children we may have had, but you\u2019re not the center of my universe. Sometimes I\u2019ve wanted you to be really badly, but that\u2019s not going to do you any favors, and it won\u2019t do me any favors when you leave home (please leave home). You can\u2019t put your spouse on the back burner for eighteen years and then say \u2018Oh, hey, you can be my number one again.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One last, admittedly vain, thing my wife and I strive to do in our marriage, is we try to look good for the other person. Sometimes that means putting on a not wrinkled shirt and the jogger sweatpants that she likes that show off my butt 30 seconds before she gets home. Other days that means a nice pair of jeans, button up shirt and cologne. Sara isn\u2019t just my friend and we\u2019re human, we all got needs. We\u2019re tired and cranky (most of the time lately), but a little bit goes a long way. We try to make good choices at the grocery store and do something active every day. Some days are harder than others, but this is what we signed up for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Wife<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

We fight, we laugh, we sit in the glow of each other\u2019s lit up iPhones in silence, and we tag each other in funny memes. Sara is seriously the best. She\u2019s not perfect, and neither am I (by a long shot), but we\u2019re constantly working towards the same goal; making the other one happy. If you\u2019re focused on what would make the other person happy instead of what will make you happy, your life will get a little easier and lot less selfish.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Wife<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cI told my wife, Sara, that I was going to be writing an article about marriage. If any of you thought you heard the sound<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2727,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2726","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-story"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/11\/559538035_1211093307507180_8275191044862054667_n.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2726","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2726"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2726\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2728,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2726\/revisions\/2728"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2727"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2726"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2726"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humorsidehub.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2726"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}