\u201cI pretend everyone I meet is in love with me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Science says that humans are naturally social creatures, but often in real life, nothing about interacting with others feels natural. Even the most confident people can struggle with what to say, how to read a room, or when to jump into a conversation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But according to Reddit, there are a handful of clever tricks that can give anyone a boost. When one user posed the question:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s an actual psychological \u2018cheat code\u2019 you use in social situations that works almost every time?\u201d responsefs flooded in, revealing simple strategies for everything from memory recall to dealing with an enemy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The 15 tricks people swear by
1. Act like everyone loves you, even strangers
\u201cI pretend everyone I meet is in love with me. I mean, not literally. I\u2019m not a complete narcissist. But I\u2019ll start conversations with strangers who give me a smile or a knowing look. Assuming they like me makes me feel more likable. I\u2019ve made friends more easily in my 30s than I did at any other time in my life.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
2. Switch gears during times of anger by getting a \u2018yes\u2019
\u201cWhen someone is angry, like irrationally, psychotically angry, get them to say \u2018yes\u2019 to anything. (E.g. Are you mad? Do you want help? Do you want me to give you space?) It engages a different part of the brain, and after that\u2019s engaged, you can help them with problem solving.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
3. Visualize it going well
\u201cBefore I go to an event, I imagine the room, the people in it, and the way I want to feel while I\u2019m in the room. Sometimes I imagine a light sweeping over everyone like it\u2019s sprinkling good vibes. I\u2019ve noticed that it makes me feel more confident and easy going when I have some anxiety about going somewhere.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
4. Deal with a loud talker by speaking quietly
\u201cSpeaking at a lower volume if someone is being unnecessarily loud. One of my best friends has a LOUD voice she is completely unaware of, which can be incredibly annoying when we\u2019re in public, so I will lower my speaking volume and she will subconsciously lower hers to match my volume.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
5. Make peace with silence
\u201cBeing comfortable in silence is power. Especially in any sort of negotiation, complaint, somebody asking for something or vice versa. For some reason when you stay quiet, people break.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
6. Build people up behind their back
\u201cBuild up people who are part of the same social circle but aren\u2019t currently present. For example, if you\u2019re out at dinner with your normal circle of friends and one of them isn\u2019t there, talk them up and share something positive about them to the rest of the group. Without consciously thinking about it, we start to become aware of the kind of things people in our social circles say about us when we\u2019re not present.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
7. Use flattery to deal with an enemy
\u201cSomeone doesn\u2019t like you? Give them a genuine compliment. Keyword: genuine.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Read the room
8. Raise a brow. Two, actually.
\u201cRaise my eyebrows when I smile hello. Usually we only do that for people we recognize so it makes people feel like they are already accepted.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
9. Take note of last conversation you had with someone
\u201cRemember what they said to you the last time you saw them. If you last saw them a month ago, if you remember they were doing a thing, remember that thing and mention it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
10. A simple trick when you don\u2019t remember someone
\u201cIf someone comes up to you and says hi, and you can\u2019t remember how you know that person, then say \u2018how have you been\u2019 instead of \u2018how are you.\u2019 99% of the time they\u2019ll start telling you about something that was going on the last time they saw you, and that will jog your memory about where you know them from.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
11. React to repetition with kindness
\u201cIt\u2019s a small one, but it comes up often enough that it\u2019s been useful. People often repeat themselves and a knee-jerk response to someone bringing up something you\u2019d already heard about is \u2018You\u2019ve told me this already,\u2019 which incidentally has a somewhat negative connotation to it. Instead of saying that, say \u2018I remember you told me about this.\u2019 It\u2019s more kindly affirming to the other person that you\u2019ve listened when they told you the details\/story in the past while also serving as a gentle reminder that they\u2019ve already shared it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
12. Smile at passive aggression
\u201cAn effective way to deal with passive-aggressive comments is \u2018stupid and cheerful.\u2019 Don\u2019t read into their comment, rise above it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Just good life advice
13. Treat all staff with dignity
\u201cAlways learn the names of the front office receptionists, custodians, maintenance crew at your place of work\/volunteering\/etc. Always say hello to them and treat them like human beings. You would be surprised at how nice they treat you and help you out.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
14. Let yourself be corrected
\u201cWhen you want to learn something \u2013 facts, rumors, gossip, etc. State the fact but leave 1 detail intentionally wrong. The other person will love to correct you and give you ALL the information. It feeds their ego, you learn what you wanted, everyone is happy with the result. It works when I use it. I know it works on me as well.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And finally\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
15. Pretend the person you\u2019re talking to is about to die
\u201cOne thing that I\u2019ll do when someone is irritating or boring me is to imagine (to myself! silently!) that they will actually die in the next 24 hours, painlessly. My job, then, is to help them have a good final 24 hours. It sounds morbid, but it\u2019s not. There\u2019s meaning and joy that can be pulled out of many moments, even dull and irritating ones.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At their core, many of these tricks are really just a different way of choosing kindness. And that truly is a strategy that works every time.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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